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Friday, 02 December 2011 20:01

Love is Like Tea - It Needs to Steep Awhile

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Dear Sappho, tea bag

This is not a question but a letter of celebration. Last year after my wife and domestic partner of 20 some years died, I was blank and heart broken. I literally did not know what to do with myself.  I pursued healing through support groups where I eventually met my new love. She is almost 20 years younger. Never could I have imagined that such love and passion could be resurrected out of such despair. I wasn’t expecting it but we fell in love and now live together.

I am amazed mostly about how every day, each relationship milestone becomes a new layer revealing new meanings of love. Not all good or perfect, but satisfying, and quickly evolving to deeper layers. Things I never thought about or simply took for granted in my old relationship are like revelations. It makes me feel both young again and a little insecure. Which makes me vulnerable, which makes my girlfriend love me more. Or so she says. Mainly I want to let your middle aged readers know that young love blooms when you least expect it.


Dear Unexpected,

Congratulations on your new love and your ability to adjust your shifting emotional perspectives. We are constantly defining and refining ourselves until the day we die. Love changes everything and is one of the best catalysts for learning and growing in the universe. But love, like tea, needs time to steep. The familiarity and acceptance you found in your previous marriage are the joys and rewards of love that withstands the test of time, like burnished gold or fine wine. A vintner friend recently told us how wine goes through many levels, depths, and layers while it is aging as well. After it is bottled, it may show promise at the beginning but if you were to open the same vintage and taste it at various times it would taste differently at all the various stages. It might not taste as good at six months and after another 6 months hints of perfection becomes apparent. Not only does the wine itself transmute or evolve but the taster does as well. Not only does the lover change and grow, but the belove(d) does likewise. Cheers to you and your new lover. Viva Sweet Love





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