Raising kids is hard enough. Mix in with that same sex parents fighting against society’s standards of the family unit, videos on crack that are slowly replacing Sesame Street and schools trying so hard to be politically correct about everything that they are failing to teach our kids anything; and you have complete and utter chaos. Everyone has an opinion on the best child rearing methods but unfortunately every kid is not the same and what works for some may not very well work for most.
Every Lesbian in the world is separated by only three exes or friends.
You'll find proof at any event where Lesbians congregate. Tell just one person some interesting or exciting news and the Lesbian phone tree and cell phone networks will light up within 5 minutes to spread the news to everyone.
The whole world will know that you're single again before your profile loads on Match.com.
They may be lurking in a neighborhood near yours and you don't even know it. It's the Lesbian counterpart to the Stepford Wives...the Lezford Wives. They drive their Gaybies to play dates in their understated, yet overpriced, family-safe Volvo. They're dressed neatly in perfectly pressed khaki pants and a delicately starched pink or baby blue polo shirt with a very comfortable pair of designer shoes with low heels. Of course there will still be football on the TV on Sundays and a cold six-pack in the fridge at all times.
Somewhere in the world there must exist an institution where Lesbians can go to learn how to be a proper Lesbian.
There will be woodworking classes, workshops to learn all about the different types of denim and flannel, and an extra credit course you can take to help you make your work boots match your outfits.
The one class that is required by all attendees will be how to shake hands properly without crushing the crap out of everyone you meet.